Archive for Anger

What are the “Must Have” Toys for a New Play Therapist? By Jennifer Taylor

Posted by Gary Yorke 
· September 11, 2017 
· 1 Comment

Questions about “must have” toys get asked so many times by clinicians new to the field of play therapy.  And, the answers can vary widely.  I’ve given parents some of my favorite toys in the past.

Dr. Landreth’s “Must Have” Toy Categories:

The foundation for play therapy training for a lot of clinicians is Dr. Garry Landreth and Child Centered Play Therapy.  He advises that play therapists include several toys from each of three categories.  Note that this list does not include everything that would fit into each category (they are just examples) and also that you do need everything on any list

Real Life

Expressive/Creative

Aggressive/Emotional Release

Directive Play Therapists “Must Have” Toys

When doing  more structured or directive play therapy interventions, you usually need things like:

“Must Have” Elements of a Play Therapy Space

It can be quite easy to find excellent toys everywhere you go.  And Dr. Garry Landreth reminds us all to beware of the urge to get everything.  He says in his book, The Art of the Relationship, “Toys should be selected, not collected.”  

And I created this infographic to summarize my thoughts on creating the perfect play therapy space that you might find helpful.

Reframing The Question

But, I just recently heard it explained in a wonderful way by a colleague, Dr. Jessica Stone, who responded to this very question during a discussion board about the Play Therapy Summit.   She gave me permission to share it with you:

Hi all, I like to take an approach of collecting gems along my way in this field. I am not sure I could identify the one thing my office couldn’t live without. It is complex. Is that my personal favorite thing? Or my client’s? Or the majority of my clients? What comprises a favorite thing?

I believe what we have in our offices needs to be a balance of 1) what is congruent with who we are, what we believe, what our theoretical foundation is, what our space allows comfortably, etc. and 2) what speaks our client’s language, what helps our clients speak, what speaks to our clients, what allows them to experience feeling heard, seen, important, and understood.

I like to take a gem from Maria Montessori and think of the tools in my office as a way of scaffolding within the office. There are items that fit where they are in this moment, items that help them move forward, and items that work when they need to regress a bit.

Sometimes these tools aren’t our preferred or favorite. Sometimes they are. As I look around my office in response to your question I think about the clients who use the majority of the tools in my office on any given day but I also think about that one client, the one who found the tool that meant the most to them and they used it in the most amazing way – whatever that meant for them – Jessica Stone, Ph.D., RPT-S”

As I was packing up my office to move out of the state this week, I found Dr Stone’s words especially helpful.  I usually play loud music when doing tasks like this, but this time, I held each of the toys and remembered the children that used them and how they used them.  It was a mix of joy and sadness as I reflected on all of those shared moments in this specific playroom.

Final Thoughts:

In the end, I would recommend selecting a few items from each of Dr. Garry Landreth’s categories and then considering Dr. Stone’s advice about seeing the value of all the different toys in the playroom. But, know that whatever you have is enough.  As long as you are in the room,  focusing on the relationship with the child and responding in an authentic manner

 

**The post What are the “Must Have” Toys for a New Play Therapist? appeared first on Jennifer Taylor Play Therapy.

 

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Categories : ADHD, Anger, Anxiety, Art Therapy, Behavior, Books, Child Development, Communication, Conflict, Depression, Feelings, Intervention Ideas, Play Therapy, Play Therapy books, Play Therapy Toys, Reader Submissions, Sandplay/Sand Tray Therapy, Social Issues

Using Creepy Dolls in the Playroom by Donna M Hammontree, LCSW, RPT-S

Posted by Gary Yorke 
· July 19, 2017 
· 1 Comment

Freddie Krueger.  Chuckie.  Jason.

Parents and children alike ask me, “Why do you have those in here?”  

I respond, “Why do you think I have those in here?”

Gary Yorke, PhD, recommended 1 or more of the play therapy dolls as good resources for the playroom.  I was skeptical but bought 3.  Deciding to assess the use of them for myself, I have determined there are multiple uses for the creepy therapy toys.

To communicate anger

A child may use the doll to let a therapist/school counselor/teacher/parent know he is angry with the adult for any reason by shaking the doll at the adult.

The creepy doll may be thrown across the room or beaten up to express anger at any bad experiences or people.

 

To communicate that a person has scared the child

A child who has been traumatized may ventilate that fear by using 1 or more of the dolls.  Sometimes that fear may come from watching scary movies; in that case, I guide care takers in being more selective in visual experiences.

To express identification with, ventilate about, or gain control over one’s own creepiness

Children on the Autism Spectrum or with physical differences may use the dolls to process how they are treated by peers on the school playground.

To express identification with the oppositional and defiant nature of the dolls

A child who presents with defiance, for whatever reason, may identify with the dolls and act out that oppositional stance.

To gain control of one’s anxieties and unrealistic fears

Some children ask me to hide the dolls as they are afraid of the dolls.  I may do so in a very early session but soon have the child take responsibility for the fear and find a way to cope with the creepy dolls themselves.  They may hide the dolls, lock them up with my play chain, or throw them away in a pretend garbage can.  Sometimes they add guards around the dolls to provide extra security.  Or, we may dress up as a superhero and find the dolls together.  This frequently leads to better coping at home.

To communicate low self-esteem, worthlessness, guilt

Play using the dolls may involve being bad and in trouble.  I work to validate the feelings in the play and then acknowledge the creepy doll’s life experiences, such as mistreated, hurt, surviving difficult times, trying to protect himself.

To express whatever the child needs to vent about

Children will use the dolls or avoid them to communicate thoughts and feelings about situations that I may never fully understand.  Being client-centered and open to their experiences is the key.

 

The professional benefits from an individual and family assessment of the client and knowledge of the child’s experience to fully understand and best respond to the child’s play.  On the other hand, being in the moment with the child and aware of the therapists’ own emotional responses to the client is often enough to further assess, validate, encourage an adaptive response by the child.

“Why do you have those in here?”

Therapist’s response, “Please tell me!”

***

 

Donna is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Registered Play Therapist/Supervisor in private practice, in Savannah, GA. Visit her website: http://www.donnahammontree.com/

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Categories : Anger, Anxiety, Autism, Behavior, Bullying, Child Development, Communication, Feelings
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Should Your Playroom Include Aggressive Toys Like Play Guns? by Jennifer Taylor, LCSW, RPT

Posted by Gary Yorke 
· June 6, 2017 
· No Comments

Play therapists widely regard the use of aggressive toys, including toys guns, as an essential element to the playroom. However, many parents are hesitant to allow their children to play with toy guns. Nearly all schools have banned the use of toys guns (or even pretend shooting) completely.

Over the years, I have had some toy guns (not realistic looking ones, though) and other times I have taken them out.  As a therapist, the use of toys guns is not essential, but the use of aggressive toys, is vital.

What is an Aggressive Toy?

Aggressive toys are anything that a child can use to get out pent up anger or hostility.  These toys can be used to role play fights or battles, good guy/bad guy situation, or other trauma re-enactments.

 

Examples of aggressive toys include:

  • Rope (I use a jump rope with the handles removed)

What is an Aggressive-Release Toy?

Aggressive-Release Toys are toys that are okay to destroy or break in some way. These toys help redirect actual aggression into a more acceptable alternative.

Examples of aggressive-release toys include:

  • Egg cartons (can be crushed)
  • Bubble wrap (can be popped)
  • Paper (can be ripped up)
  • Popsicle sticks (can be snapped or jabbed into clay)
  • Wet paper towels (can be thrown against wall outside or on easel)
  • Clay or Play-doh (can be pounded)

Why Are Aggressive Toys Useful In Therapy?

Expressing Anger

Children need a safe opportunity to express feelings of anger.  In the play therapy environment, children can use aggressive toys to play out things that are happening with people in their lives. BUT…when it is done with an animal instead of a doll person, it feels safer to the child.  It is the same feeling/movements/thoughts but it doesn’t feel as real.

Relieving Physical Tension

Also, when using aggressive release toys, children get to move their bodies in a way that helps relieve the physical tension that anger brings.  Pounding clay, stomping egg cartons, or swinging foam swords helps move the body in ways that release tension and the accompanying noise that the movement makes also helps reduce tension.

Learning Boundaries

Finally, aggressive play helps teach children boundaries.  In rough/aggressive play, children learn how hard to swing without actually hurting the therapist, or how fast to move without falling down.  They learn how to “take a break” if someone needs to rest and how to start back up again.  I have witnessed siblings learn how to set rules for “fair fights” using foam swords and how to negotiate cheating.

Sword Fighting Aggressive Play

My Kids Sword Fighting

Do Aggressive Toys Create Aggressive Children?

It depends on what research you read.  A few studies have shown that aggression may increase temporarily after playing with aggressive toys.  This DOES seem to be more true when you are talking about playing violent video games (different story there). But, long-term, there is no reliable evidence that toy guns create more aggressive kids.

In fact, the opposite holds more true.  If a child has an appropriate place to express and display anger, then they are less likely to use anger with their peers (or parents).  Telling children, “Don’t get mad” is not nearly as helpful as teaching them what to do when they are mad to diffuse it.  The use of aggressive release toys helps teach children what to do with their angry in a way that will not get them in trouble.

Children Will Find Creative Ways To Express Aggression

In fact, many therapists find that children will turn neutral toys like blocks or their fingers into guns, knives, or bombs in order to communicate their needs with whatever is available.  The expression often goes:

If a child needs a gun to represent something going on in their life, they will find something and turn it into a gun (either in shape or with the noises that they make) to communicate that need.”

What To Do If You Are Uncomfortable With Toy Guns?

  1. Set limits.  It might be that toy guns are only for target practice. “Guns are not for shooting at people.”  When I have any toy guns in my office, I NEVER shoot at children.  I have let them shoot at me, but I would not shoot back at them.  If they tell me to shoot them, I would act out thinking about it but being so worried that they would die or I would go to jail or some other bad  outcome.  A great play therapist, Lisa Dion, writes more about how to play aggressively with children in her book, Integrating Extremes: Aggression and Death in the Playroom. 
  2. Set different limits for different games.  You might say that you can not shoot at me in general, but then we make a specific limit for Nerf or laser style games where we have defined a goal or specific rules. These games typically have teams, time limits, and rules of engagement.  You discuss them in advance and determine that the shooting ends when the game ends.
  3. Make sure your guns look very fake.  Avoid anything that is at all realistic.  Guns that are bright colors, light up, or make silly noises all classify as fake guns.  Guns that shoot foam balls.
  4. Use the alternative aggressive toys.  If you are still not comfortable with toy guns, use the alternatives.  Foam swords are generally more fun than toy guns anyway.

A Side Note About Gun Safety:

Regardless of your use of toy guns, there is never a bad time to talk with children about what to do if they find a gun while playing.  Just recently, there was an incident here in Memphis where a child picked up a gun and shot his brother accidentally.

There are many factors in that case that have nothing to do with aggressive play or aggressive toys. And yet, the underlying fear is that if we let our children play with aggressive toys, things like this will happen.  So…

  1. Talk about actual gun safety.  Talk with your children about what to do if they ever encountered a gun outside of the playroom and what to do and not do about it.  You can discuss that they should never pick up a gun outside of the playroom and that they should notify an adult right away.
  2. Require gun safety from adults.  It’s okay to ask the parents of your child’s friends if they own any weapons and how/where they have them stored.  Same goes for grandparents or other relatives. Don’t just assume that they are responsible gun owners, make them prove it.  Everyone that I know that has any weapons in their home can easily tell me how they are keeping them safe.

Final Thoughts:

Recently, I polled a group of play therapists and they overwhelmingly reported that they not only had toy guns in their offices, but that they found them to be an essential component of a play therapy space. However, those that did not have toy guns felt that the same benefits were achieved through the use of other aggressive release toys (like ropes, knives and swords) without the complications.

PS.

Moreover, representing reality in the playroom is important.  The truth is that many children have parents that work with weapons (law enforcement and military) and others have been exposed to very traumatic events involving drug raids, shootings, or other community violence.

To deny access to those items or experiences seems to somehow convey that those feelings, thoughts or experiences are shameful, wrong, or not important.  The playroom is a place to overcome those feelings and any toys that facilitate that process are okay in my office.

Do you allow your children to play with toy guns?

***

Thanks to Jennifer Taylor for this great post!

To check out Jennifer’s website, click here!

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Categories : Anger, Behavior, Bullying, Communication, Conflict, Intervention Ideas, Play Therapy, Reader Submissions
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Aggressive Girls By Leah Davies, M.Ed.

Posted by Gary Yorke 
· March 15, 2017 
· 1 Comment

girls leaninggirl with hood2

 

Aggression or bullying can be defined as any action that inflicts physical or mental harm upon another person. Girls usually differ from boys in the type of aggressive behavior they exhibit. While boys tend to inflict bodily pain, girls most often, though not exclusively, engage in covert or relational aggression. Girls tend to value intimate relationships with girls, while boys usually form social bonds through group activities. Aggressive girls often gain power by withholding their friendship or by sabotaging the relationships of others.
Relational aggression is calculated manipulation to injure or to control another child’s ability to maintain rapport with peers. For example, a relational aggressive girl may insist that her friends ignore a particular child, exclude her from their group, form secret pacts to humiliate the child, call her names, and/or spread rumors about her.

Examples of manipulation include, “If you don’t play this game, I’ll tell Sara that you called her stupid,” or “You have to do what I say, or I won’t play with you.” Children in preschool have been observed excluding peers by saying, “Don’t let her play,” or using retaliation, “She was mean to me yesterday, so she can’t be our friend.” In older girls, the gossip can be more vicious, for example, “I saw her cheating.”

Though often subtle, nonverbal communication of an aggressive girl is unmistakable. For example, she may roll her eyes, glare, ignore, turn away, point, or pass notes to a friend concerning the rejected child.

In 1995, Crick and Grotpeter found that members of groups run by aggressive girls appeared to be caring and helpful toward each other. However, they also observed a higher level of intimacy and secret sharing in these groups. This closeness puts followers at risk because the aggressive child is privy to personal information that she can disclose. They also noted a higher level of exclusivity in groups run by relational aggressive girls. In other words, the followers usually have few other friends to turn to if they are rejected by the aggressive child, hence they continued to conform for fear of being isolated. They found a higher level of aggression within these groups.

Girls often feel pressured to be compliant and not show negative emotions. When they cannot assert their true feelings directly, resentment lingers and their anger manifests itself indirectly. Excessive relational aggressiveness can become a habit that can cause a lifetime of problematic relationships. Therefore, a girl who exhibits this behavior needs adult intervention and guidance. It should be stressed that these girls often have leadership ability, but they need assistance to channel it in a positive direction.

Relational aggression in girls has a negative affect on school climate and culture, as well as on the perpetrators and their victims. According to Crick, relational aggressive girls are disliked more than most children their age. They exhibited adjustment problems and reported higher levels of loneliness and depression. These girls often have difficulty creating and sustaining social and personal bonds. Ridiculed children have adjustment difficulties, as well. The rejection and hurt they feel can last a lifetime. They are more likely than peers to be submissive, have low grades, drop out of school, engage in delinquent behavior, experience depression, and entertain suicidal thoughts.

What can school personnel do to combat the negative impact of relational aggression on perpetrators and their targets?

    1. Increase awareness among school staff so that they understand what relational aggression is and discuss ways to combat it. Consequences for relentless covert aggression will vary depending on school discipline procedures, the action, and the age of the girls. Consequences could include a referral to a counseling group or losing privileges.
    2. Observe children in the classroom, at lunch, in the hall, on the playground, and before and after school, noting students’ nonverbal reactions to peers. Ask yourself:
      • Who is alone on the playground?
      • Who is a group leader?
      • How do her followers act toward others?
    3. Discuss relational aggression with your students to make sure they know that starting rumors, ridiculing others, and other forms of covert aggression are not acceptable.
    4. Reinforce student social interaction skills through the use of role-playing exercises, literature, writing assignments, and other means. Emphasize considering the feelings of others, developing listening skills, and exhibiting other character traits that are critical to forming lasting friendships.
    5. Help girls understand that conflicts are a natural occurrence in friendships and provide them with an opportunity to practice being supportive of one another. Encourage them to honestly resolve problems through open discussion and compromise.
    6. Believe the victim. Relational aggressive girls are skillful at concealing their bullying. Hence, many educators are blinded by the appearance of a model student who they feel would never engage in covert aggression.
    7. Understand that having at least one friend buffers a child from relationship aggression, so facilitating friendships between girls will help them cope with a relational aggressive child. Encourage girls to choose friends who are considerate and trustworthy, not exclusive or mean.
    8. Model respect and caring. Assist each girl in developing the belief that she is a capable person who has many strengths and who can stand up for herself by reinforcing these attitudes at every opportunity.
    9. Find assistance for the victim and perpetrator. Contact a parent and/or work with staff to foster their social and emotional development.

 

***

leah daviesCheck out all of the Leah Davies‘ innovative and dynamic Kelly Bear materials on the Child Therapy Toys website!

Leah Davies received her Master’s Degree from the Department of Counseling and Counseling Psychology, Auburn University. She has been dedicated to the well-being of children for over 44 years as a certified teacher, counselor, prevention specialist, parent, and grandparent. Her professional experience includes teaching, counseling, consulting, instructing at Auburn University, and directing educational and prevention services at a mental health agency.

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Categories : Anger, Bullying, Conflict, Parenting, Reader Submissions, Social Issues

Cognitive Restructuring for Children By Donna Hammontree, LCSW

Posted by Gary Yorke 
· January 4, 2017 
· 1 Comment

 

calm-girl

 

Cognitive restructuring occurs regularly in the playroom as a child experiences the therapist’s full acceptance. Teaching cognitive restructuring, however, may expedite the process of having a child experience heartfelt self-acceptance.  A useful analogy is that of a school teacher teaching classroom rules. The teacher will allow students to learn classroom rules throughout the first week of school through experience, but prior to that experience, the teacher will verbally share the rules, and may even write them out and post them.

Here are a few ways a play therapist can teach cognitive restructuring:

  • Identify and highlight for the child’s their cognitive distortion while tracking play.

 “You don’t think you can do it.”  (I am helpless or powerless.)

 “So, nobody likes you?”     (I am worthless.)

“Your teacher should do it your way.”     (I should be in charge.)

  • Discuss how what we think affects how we feel and how we act.
  • Use drawings to illustrate:
    1. Take 2 sheets of paper and draw an oval face with eyes on each sheet. Write Thought, Feeling, and Action on each sheet beside each face.    On the 1st sheet, write “I can’t do anything right” beside the word Thought.  Have the child draw a face on the oval showing how the person would then feel.  Then ask the child how a sad person would act and write a short answer for the child next to the word
    2. Next, write the exact opposite of the cognitive distortion (this is a cognitive distortion too!) at the top of this same sheet. For example, “I do everything right!”  The child will agree that this is not true.  Let the child cross out this statement, or put an X next to it.
    3. On the 2nd sheet write, “I do some things right!” Help the child think of some things they do correctly.  Identify the feelings that go with recognizing what they can do, and encourage the child to illustrate the feelings associated with these abilities on the face. Ask the child how this person might act, and the child’s response next to the word “Action.”
    4. This activity can be repeated with the child’s cognitive distortion(s), followed by a rational thought developed by the therapist and child. spacer  cognitive-restructuring-worksheet-1      cognitive-restructuring-worksht-2     cognitive-restructuring-worksheet-3     cognitive-restructuring-worksheet-4

spry-sparrow-book-cover

  • Use bibliotherapy. Spry Sparrow:  From Drab to Fab illustrates how having a negative cognition contributes to feelings of sadness and anxiety.  In the story, Spry compares herself to others and thinks, “I am not good enough.”  Spry’s mother helps Spry identify realistic, positive cognitions.  Heartfelt change occurs for Spry when she accepts the positive thoughts as real for herself.  Encouraging parents to read the book to a child helps the parent understand cognitive restructuring as well.
  • As the child plays, track the new thought as the child practices it behaviorally in session.  For example, say, “Oh, you did that by yourself!  You can do some things!”
  • At the end of the session, meet with the child and their caregivers and discuss the new thought.  Ask the caregiver to reinforce the new thought: For example, when the child plays with a cousin, the caregiver might reflect that the cousin likes the child and ask the child to repeat, “My cousin likes me!  Some people like me!”

landofpsymon       drplaywellpositivethinking      positivethoughts

A cautionary note:  Some children are truly unloved and taught that they do nothing right. In these cases, these interventions may not be appropriate in the early stages of therapy, and will need to be preceded by other interventions. It is also important to note that Cognitive Behavioral Therapy has two parts:  cognitive restructuring and behavioral change.  Children are able to learn new beliefs about the world, their relationships, and themselves by understanding cognitive restructuring.  They will also need to practice new behaviors, reinforced with new beliefs, to experience heartfelt change.

Celebrate feeling happier!

Donna is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Registered Play Therapist/Supervisor in private practice, in Savannah, GA. Visit her website: http://www.donnahammontree.com/

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Categories : Anger, Anxiety, Art Therapy, Behavior, Bibliotherapy, Books, Child Development, Communication, Depression, Feelings, Intervention Ideas, Play Therapy, Play Therapy books, Play Therapy Games, Reader Submissions

Monster Mad by Jessalyn Pedone

Posted by Gary Yorke 
· November 28, 2016 
· 1 Comment

angry-girl

Theme: Expressing feelings, coping skills, relaxation skills

Recommended Ages: Pre-K through 5th grade, as well as family members who may be older

Goals: Identifying and expressing feelings appropriately

Identifying appropriate ways to cope with feelings

Materials: Monster Stomp Board Game 

Description: Monster Stomp is a game that children really enjoy. They get to STOMP monsters and enjoy sensory play with the play-doh while creating monsters for the game, and when putting the stomped monster in jail.

monster-stomp

Begin the activity by explaining how the game is played and either make the monsters with the enclosed clay, or display the Monsters you made in advance. Explain that anytime a monster is stomped the participants may choose a feeling. This could be a negative feeling that they have experienced during the previous week (i.e. Monster Mad), a feeling they’d like to have, or a feeling they anticipate having.  Participants should then discuss the feeling and identify coping strategies or relaxation techniques they can use to manage the negative feeling, or if they have identified a feeling they’d like to have, something they could do to achieve that feeling. This can be done in individual or family sessions.

Discussion:

Both during and after the game, process the feelings and skills discussed. Monster Stomp is especially useful when teaching children appropriate ways to express anger, identify triggers for anger, and cognitions or thoughts that might contribute to anger. The process of smashing the monster can act as an stimulus for identifying and expressing angry thoughts and the therapist can talk about “taming the angry monster.”  Role playing strategies for managing anger (e.g., deep breathing, punching a pillow, talking about it, or an anger dance that includes stomping out all the anger) is also important.

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Categories : Anger, Play Therapy, Reader Submissions

BIBLIOTHERAPY

Posted by Gary Yorke 
· September 6, 2016 
· 1 Comment

 

Bibliotherapy is a fancy way of saying it’s OK to use books in therapy.  Bibliotherapy is the use of literature to bring about a therapeutic interaction between the adult and the child.  The term originated in 1916 in an article in The Atlantic Monthly. Samuel Crothers suggested using books in hospitals to help patients solve problems and develop insight. There is a very powerful dynamic that takes place when we sit next to a child and read a book. There are thousands of self-help books written for children.  When we sit next to the child and read them the book it becomes a catalyst to discuss their challenges, identify strategies, and then role play and practice those strategies. Books can be sent home with the child, with specific instructions to read them with the parent and bring them back next week.

 

One of the more popular and enduring series of self-help books for children are from Parenting Press. The Children’s Problem Solving Series contains titles such as “I Want It,” My Name is Not Dummy,” and “Mommy Don’t Go.”  The Dealing With Feelings Series contains titles such as I’m Frustrated,” I’m Furious,” and “I’m Scared.” A nice feature of these books is that they are interactive. Children get to pick different behaviors or strategies to challenges presented in the stories. The reader then goes to the section of the book where that strategy is tried and together, reader and child, discover how that affects the outcome.  It is recommended that therapist and child role play and practice the strategies they choose whenever possible. The child should also be asked to explain the strategy to the parent and the parent can be loaned the book to read it to the child during the week.books

 

Other books that might be useful:

A Boy and A Bear: The Children’s Relaxation Book, by Lori Lite, A CD with this and two other stories is also available: Indigo Dreams CD.  The child and parent can then listen to the stories together. This story is a nice one to read, or listen to, at night just before going to sleep. From Head to Toe, by Eric Carle, is a picture book that can be used to practice deep muscle relaxation. As you go through the book with the child, practice the stretches along with deep breathing. Don’t Feed the Worry Bug (& Wince the Worry Monster) is a nice story to read with children who have generalized anxiety.
books1

 

 

Childtherapytoys.com carries a wide selection of books for children.  Here are some of the books we carry, organized by subject.

 

About Therapy – For Kids

A Child’s First Book About Play Therapy by Marc Nemiroff, Ph.D. and Jane Annunziata, Psy.D.

My Listening Friend: A Story About the Benefits of Counseling Book by P.J. Michaels

 

Abuse, Neglect & Domestic Violence

It’s My Body: A Book to Teach Young Children How to Resist Uncomfortable Touch by Lory Freeman

Something Happened and I’m Scared to Tell: A Book for Young Victims of Abuse by Patricia Kehoe, Ph.D.

Loving Touches: A Book for Children about Positive Caring Kinds of Touching by Lory Freeman

Something Is Wrong at My House by Diane Davis

Mi Cuerpo es MIO (It’s MY Body) by Lory Freeman

Algo Paso y Me Da Miedo Decirlo (Something Happened and I’m Scared to Tell) by Patricia Kehoe, Ph.D.

El Problema con Los Secretos (The Trouble with Secrets) by Karen Johnsen

Algo Anda Mal en Mi Casa (Something Is Wrong at my House) by Diane Davis

The Trouble with Secrets by Karen Johnsen

A Terrible Thing Happened: A story for children who have witnessed violence or trauma by Margaret M. Holmes

Reena’s Bollywood Dream: A Story about Sexual Abuse by Jewel Kats

Annabelle’s Secret: A Story about Sexual Abuse by Amy Barth

I Can Play It Safe by Alison Feigh

Will the Courageous: A Story about Sexual Abuse

Hannah Without a Home by Patti Hall, LCSW, and Shelia Devine, MIM

My Body Is Mine, My Feelings Are Mine by Susan Hoke, LCSW, ACSW

 

Adolescence

ADHD: A Teenager’s Guide by James J. Crist, Ph.D.

Mad: Hot to Deal with Anger and Get Respect by James Crist, Ph.D.

How to Talk to an Autistic Kid by Daniel Stefanski

Why Are You So Scared? A Child’s Book About Parents with PTSD by Beth Andrews

When No One Understand by Brad Sachs, Ph.D.

Be the Boss of Your Pain: Self-Care for Kids by Timothy Culbert, M.D., and Rebecca Kajander C.P.N.P, M.P.H.

Be the Boss of Your Stress: Self-Care for Kids by Timothy Culbert, M.D., and Rebecca Kajander C.P.N.P, M.P.H.

How to Take the GRRRR Out of Anger by Elizabeth Verdick and Majorie Lisovskis

The Inside Story on Teen Girls: Experts Answer Teens’ Questions by Karen Zager, Alice Rubenstein

Life Lists for Teens: Tips, Steps, Hints, and How-Tos for Growing Up, Getting Along, Learning and Having Fun by Pamela Espeland

When Nothing Matters Anymore: A Survival Guide for Depressed Teens by Bev Cobain, R.N., C.

The Courage to Be Yourself: True Stories by Teens About Cliques, Conflicts, and Overcoming Peer Pressure edited by Al Desetta, M.A., and Educators for Social Responsibility

Too Stressed to Think? A Teen Guide to Staying the Same When Life Makes You Crazy by Annie Fox, M.Ed., and Ruth Kirschner

The Power to Prevent Suicide (for teens, updated edition) by Richard E. Nelson, Ph.D, and Judith C. Galas

GLBTQ: The Survival Guide for Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, and Questioning Teens (Revised & Updated Second Edition) by Kelly Huegel

My Anxious Mind: A Teen’s Guide to Managing Anxiety and Panic by Michael Tompkins and Katherine Martinez

The Mouse, the Monster, and Me – Assertiveness for Young People (Curb Bullying) by Pat Palmer, Ed.D.

 

ADD/ADHD and Learning Differences

ADHD: A Teenager’s Guide by James J. Crist, Ph.D.

All Dogs Have ADHD by Kathy Hoopmann

Annie’s Plan: Taking Charge of Schoolwork and Homework by Jeanne Kraus

Cory Stories: A Kids Book About Living with ADHD by Jeanne Kraus

Ditzabled Princess: A Comical Diary by Jewel Kats

Eukee the Jumpy Elephant by Clifford L. Corman, M.D.

I Just Want to Do It My Way! My Story About Staying on Task by Julia Cook

It’s Hard To Be A Verb! (a book about focusing) by Julia Cook

Learning to Slow Down and Pay Attention by Kathleen G. Nadeau, Ph.D., and Ellen B. Dixon, Ph.D.

Max Pays Attention by Barbara Gibson-Paul, Psy.D.

Me Van A Ayudar: El TDA explicado a los niños by Marc A. Nemiroff, Ph.D., and Jane Annunziata, Psy.D.

My Mouth is a Volcano by Julia Cook

Otto Learns about His Medicine: A Story about Medication for Children with ADHD (third edition) by Matthew Galvin, M.D.

Out of This World: Hey Max… Pay Attention! The Importance of Concentration by Jon Filitti

Out of This World: Max Strives for Success! Victory through Motivation by Jon Filitti

Soda Pop Head (cool down before you fizz!) by Julia Cook

Sometimes I Drive My Mom Crazy (But I Know She’s Crazy About Me) by Lawrence E. Shapiro, Ph.D.

The Asperkid’s Launch Pad: Home Design to Empower Everyday Superheroes by Jennifer Cook O’Toole

The Don’t Give Up Kid by Jeanne Gehret

The Princess and the Ruby: An Autism Fairy Tale by Jewel Kats

The Rabbit Who Lost His Hop by Marica Shoshana Nass

The Survival Guide for Kids with ADD or ADHD by John F. Taylor, Ph.D.

This Morning Sam Went to Mars: A Book about Paying Attention by Nancy Carlson

Understanding Sam and Asperger Syndrome by Clarabelle van Niekerk and Liezl Venter

What is it Like to Be Me? A Book About a Boy with Asperger’s Syndrome by Alenka Klemenec

Can I Tell You About Dyslexia? A Guide for Friends, Family and Professionals by Alan M. Hultquist

The Survival Guide for Gifted Kids by Judy Galbraith, M.A.

How to Be Human: Diary of an Autistic Girl by Florida Frenz

Learning to Feel Good and Stay Cool: Emotional Regulation Tools for Kids with AD/HD by Judith M. Glasser, Ph.D., and Kathleen G Nadeau, Ph.D.

Attention Girls: A Guide to Learn All About Your AD/HD by Patricia O. Quinn, M.D.

 

Adoption/Foster Care

All About Adoption by Marc Nemiroff and Jane Annunziata

Finding the Right Spot: When Kids Can’t Live With Their Parents by Janice Levy

Maybe Days: A Book for Children in Foster Care by Jennifer Wilgocki, MS, and Marcia Kahn Wright, Ph.D.

Zachary’s New Home: A Story for Foster and Adopted Children by Geraldine M. Blomquisst, M.S.W. and Paul Blomquist

Kids Need to Be Safe: A Book for Children in Foster Care by Julie Nelson

Families Change: A Book for Children Experiencing Termination of Parental Rights by Julie Nelson

Billy Had to Move: A Foster Care Story by Theresa Ann Fraser, CYW, B.A.

Who is in Your Family? A Celebration in Diversity by Susan Bowman

Good for You, Grisha: Teaching Kids Ways to Cope by Karen Westhoven

 

Anger

What to Do When You’re Cranky and Blue by James J. Crist, Ph.D.

Boom the Anger Tamer: An Emotes Book About Anger by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Cloud’s Best Worst Day Ever by Amy Novesky

Cool Down and Work Through Anger by Cheri J. Meiners, M.Ed.

Every Time I Blow My Top I Lose My Head! By Laura Slap-Sheltion, Psy.D., and Lawrence E. Shapiro, Ph.D.

Everything I Do You Blame on Me! By Allyson Aborn, MSW, CSW

Frog’s Breathtaking Speech by Michael Chissick

Hands are Not for Hitting by Martine Agassi, Ph.D.

How to Take the GRRRR Out of Anger by Elizabeth Verdick and Marjorie Lisovskis

Mad: How to Deal with Anger and Get Respect by James J. Crist, Ph.D.

Out of This World: Face to Face with X-35 by Jon Filitti

Soda Pop Head (cool down before you fizz!) by Julia Cook

Sometimes I Like to Fight (But I Don’t Do It Much Anymore) by Lawrence E. Shapiro, Ph.D.

The Penguin Who Lost Her Cool by Marla Sobel

The Very Angry Day That Amy Didn’t Have by Lawerence E. Shapiro

The Very Frustrated Monster by Andi Green

What to do When Your Temper Flares by Dawn Huebner, Ph.D.

When You’re MAD and You Know It by Elizabeth Crary, M.S. and Shari Steelsmith

Zach Apologizes by William Mulcahy

Zach Get Frustrated by William Mulcahy

Cant Loses His Cool: An Emotes Book About Temper Tantrums by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Cant Pierde Su Calma: Un Libro Emotes Sobre Las Rabietas by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Boom the Anger Tamer: An Emotes Book About Anger by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Learning to Feel Good and Stay Cool: Emotional Regulation Tools for Kids With AD/HD by Judith M. Glasser, Ph.D., and Kathleen G. Nadeau, Ph.D.

I Hate Everything! By Sue Graves

 

Anxiety/Worry/Shyness

A Boy and a Bear: The Children’s Relaxation Book by Lori Lite

Be the Boss of Your Stress: Self-Care for Kids by Timothy Culbert, M.D., and Rebecca Kajander C.P.N.P., M.P.H.

Blueloon by Julia Cook

Bolsitas raras by Tiziana Bruno Rosa

Bug Makes a Splash by Amy Novesky

Caillou: Day Care by Christine L’Heureux and Gisèle Lègarè

Can I Tell You About Selective Mutism? A Guide For Friends, Family, and Professionals by Maggie Johnson and Alison Wintgens

Celia the Great: Tricks for Being a Happy Kid by Abby Jacobs

Cómo apreciarme by Pat Palmer

Cucho le dice NO al estrés by N. Barceló G. / C. Bordagorry A.

Does This Make Me Beautiful? By Harriet Morse

Don’t Blame Me! Prepare to Excel Beyond Your Wildest Dreams by Larry Cole

Don’t Feed the Worry Bug by Andi Green

Frog’s Breathtaking Speech by Michael Chissick

The Monster Who Couldn’t Decide by Andi Green

Full Mouse, Empty Mouse: A Tale of Food and Feelings by Dina Zeckhausen, Ph.D.

Get Out of Your Mind & Into Your Life for Teens by Joseph V. Ciarrochi, Ph.D., Louise Hayes, PH.D., and Ann Baily M.A.

Good for You, Grisha: Teaching Kids Ways to Cope by Karen Westhoven

How to Feel Good: 20 Things Teens Can Do by Tricia Mangan

Joi’s Cyber-Coaster Adventure: An Emotes Book About Positive Thinking by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Liking Myself (3rd Edition) by Pat Palmer, Ed.D.

Mideos y Manias by Lluís Farré

My Anxious Mind: A Teen’s Guide to Managing Anxiety and Panic by Michael Tompkins and Katherine Martinez

Nuevas téchnicas de relajación para niños y adolescents by Silvina Hopkins

Please Explain “Anxiety” to Me! : Simple Biology and Solutions for Children and Parents by Laurie Zelinger, Ph.D. and Jordan Zelinger

Pressure-True Stories by Teens About Stress edited by Al Desetta

Scary Night Visitors: A Story for Children with Bedtime Fears by Irene Wineman and Paul Marcus, Ph.D.

Sometimes I Don’t Like to Talk (But Sometimes I Can’t Keep Quiet) by Jessica Lamb-Shapiro

Sometimes I Worry Too Much (But Now I Know How To Stop) by Dawn A. Huebner, Ph.D.

Sometimes I’m Scared by Jane Annunziata, Psy.D., and Marc Nemiroff, Ph.D.

Stress Can Really Get On Your Nerves by Trevor Romain and Elizabeth Verdick

The Bear Who Lost His Sleep by Jennifer Lamb-Shapiro

The Chimp Who Lost Her Chatter by Lawrence E. Shapiro

The Dragon Who Pulled Her Scales by William Michael Davidson

The Hyena Who Lost Her Laugh by Jennifer Lamb-Shapiro

The Lion Who Lost His Roar by Marcia Shoshana Nass

The Lonely Little Monster by Andi Green

The Monster in the Bubble by Andi Green

The Mouse the Monster and Me– Assertiveness for Young People by Pat Palmer

The Nose That Didn’t Fit by Andi Green

The Panicosaurus by K.I. Al-Ghani

Think Confident, Be Confident for Teens by Marci G. Fox Ph.D. and Leslie Sokol Ph.D.

Tommy Starts Something Big: Giving Cuddles and Kindness by Chuck Gaidica and Kris Yankee

What to Do When You Dread Your Bed by Dawn Huebner

What to Do When You Grumble Too Much: A Kid’s Guide to Overcoming Negativity by Dawn Huebner

What to Do When You Worry Too Much: A Kid’s Guide to Overcoming Anxiety by Dawn Huebner

What to Do When You’re Scared & Worried: A Guide for Kids by James J. Crist, Ph.D.

What to Do When Your Brain Gets Stuck: A Kid’s Guide to Overcoming OCD by Dawn Huebner

When Lizzy Was Afraid of Trying New Things by Inger Maier, Ph.D.

When No One Understands by Brad Sachs, Ph.D.

Who Feels Scared? By Sue Graves

Why Are You So Scared? A Child’s Book About Parents with PTSD by Beth Andrews

Why Would Someone Want to Die? By Rebecca C. Schmidt

Wilma Jean the Worry Machine by Julia Cook

Some Days Are Lonely by Young-Ah Kim

Big Ernie’s New Home: A Story for Children Who Are Moving by Teresa and Whitney Martin

Jumpi Goes to Camp: An Emotes Book About Being Afraid by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Super and Perfecto: An Emotes Book About Confidence by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Good Night Giants by Heinz Janisch

New Kid, New Scene: A Guide to Moving and Switching Schools by Debbie Glassner, Ph.D., and Emily Schneck

Understanding Myself: A Kid’s Guide to Intense Emotions and Strong Feelings by Mary C. Lamia, Ph.D.

Can I tell you about OCD? A Guide for Friends, Family and Professionals by Amita Jassi

Oh No, School! By Hae-Kyung Chang

Drain and the Mystery of Sleep by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Jumpi Va a Campar: Un Libro Emotes Sobre Tener Miedo by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

A Happy Hat by Cecil Kim

School Made Easier: A Kid’s Guide to Study Strategies & Anxiety Busting Tools by Wendy L. Moss

 

Autism/PDD

All Cats Have Asperger Syndrome by Kathy Hoopmann

How to Talk to an Autistic Kid by Daniel Stefanski

I Just Want to Do It My Way! My Story About Staying on Task by Julia Cook

Keisha’s Doors: An Autism Story/Las Puerton de Keisha: Book One by Marvie Ellis

Tacos Anyone? / Alguien quiere tacos? By Marvie Ellis

The Asperkid’s Launch Pad: Home Design to Empower Everyday Superheroes by Jennifer Cook O’Toole

The Princess and the Ruby: An Autism Fairy Tale by Jewel Kats

The Survival Guide for Kids with Autism Spectrum Disorders (And Their Parents) by Elizabeth Verdick and Elizabeth Reeve, M.D.

Understanding Sam and Asperger Syndrome Clarabelle van Niekerk and Liezl Venter

What Is It Like to Be Me? A Book about a Boy with Asperger’s Syndrome by Alenka Klemen

How to Be Human: Diary of an Autistic Girl by Florida Frez

 

Behavior Management

Imagine That! Imagery Stories to Help Young People Learn to Improve Their Behavioral Self-Control by Janis L. Silverman, M.A.

The Survival Guide for Kids with Behavior Challenges by Tom McIntyre, Ph.D.

I Can’t Do Anything by Thierry Robberecht

 

Bullying, Teasing, Peer Conflict, Friendship

Becoming Someone’s Hero: A Book for the Bystanders of Bullying by Sandy Ragona

Browser the Moues and His Internet Adventures by Barbara C. Trolley, Ph.D., CRC, Constance Hanel, M.S.Ed, and Kinda L. Shields, M.S.Ed

Bullies Are a Pain in the Brain by Trevor Romain

But Why Can’t I? By Sue Graves

Bystander Power: Now with Anti-Bulling Action by Phyllis Kaufman Goodstein and Elizabeth Verdick

Caillou: Play With Me! By Christine L’Heureux

Cliques Just Don’t Make Cents by Julia Cook

Crow by Leo Timmers

Dare! By Erin Frankel

Don’t Squeal Unless It’s A Big Deal: A Tale of Tattletales by Jeanie Franz Ransom, M.A., and Jackie Ubanovic

Girl Grudges: Learning How to Forgive and Live by Cheryl Dellasega, Ph.D. and Shileste Overton Morris, B.A.

How Not to be a Bully Target by Terry Centrone

How To Be A Bully! …Not! By Marcia Nass, MS

How to Talk to an Autistic Kid by Daniel Stefanski

I Am Stumped by Lisa Rivard

If You’re Bothered…and you know it by Tricia Murin

It Will Get Better: Finding Your Way Through Teen Issues by Melinda Hutchings

Kicky the Mean Chick Learns Her Lesson & Other Kicky Tales by Erika Karres

Mookey the Monkey Gets Over Being Teased by Heather Lonczak

My Best Friend is Me! By Beth Ann Marcozzi

My Name is Not Dummy by Elizabeth Crary, M.S.

The Lonely Little Monster by Andi Green

Not Fair, Won’t Share by Sue Graves

Out of This World: Tiglos vs Secca Ma by John Filitti

Pressure – True Stories by Teens About Stress edited by Al Desetta

Ricky Sticky Fingers by Julia Cook

The Nose that Didn’t Fit by Andi Green

Soda Pop Head (cool down before you fizz!) by Julia Cook

Tease Monster: A Book about Teasing vs. Bullying by Julia Cook

Teddy Bear Princess: A Story About Sharing and Caring by Jewel Kats

The Hero in Me by Susan Fitzsimonds

The Juice Box Bully: Empowering Kids to Stand Up for Others by Bob Sornson and Maria Dismondy

The Mouse, The Monster, and Me – Assertiveness for Young People by Pat Palmer

The Penguin Who Lost Her Cool by Marla Sobel

Tough! By Erin Frankel

Vicious – True Stories by Teens About Bullying edited by Hope Vanderberg

Weird! By Erin Frankel

Words Are Not for Hurting/Las palabras no son para lastimar by Elizabeth Verdick

Zach Apologizes by William Mulcahy

Zach Gets Frustrated by William Mulcahy

Don’t Call Me A Tattletale! By Kimberly Koskos

El Ratón, El Monstruo y Yo: Conducta asertiva para los jóvenes by Pat Palmer, Ed.D

Eli’s Lie-O-Meter by Sandra Levins

Abash and the Cyber-Bully: An Emotes Book About Bullying by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Imp and the Fib Invasion: An Emotes Book About Telling the Truth by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Joi’s Cyber-Coaster Adventure: An Emotes Book About Positive Thinking by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Circle of Three: Enough Friendship to Go Around? By Elizabeth Brokamp

Stand Up and Speak Up! By Bob Sornson

Sally Sore Loser: A Story About Winning & Losing by Frank J. Sileo

New Kid, New Scene: A Guide to Moving and Switching Schools by Debbie Glassner, Ph.D.

 

Comics/Out of This World Guidance Series

Out of This World: Hey Max…Pay Attention! The Importance of Concentration by John Filitti

Out of This World: Max Strives for Success! Victory Through Motivation by John Filitti

Out of This World: Face to Face with X-35 by John Filitti

Out of This World: Tiglos vs Secca Ma by John Filitti

 

Conflict Resolution

The Kids’ Guide to Working Out Conflicts: How to Keep Cool, Stay Safe, and Get Along by Naomi Drew, M.A.

The Courage To Be Yourself: True Stories by Teens About Cliques, Conflicts, and Overcoming Peer Pressure edited by Al Desetta

Don’t Call Me a Tattletale by Kimberly Koskos

Circle of Three: Enough Friendship to Go Around? By Elizabeth Brokamp

 

Cyber/Internet Safety

Abash and the Cyber-Bully: An Emotes Book About Bullying by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Joi’s Cyber-Coaster Adventure: An Emotes Book About Positive Thinking by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Browser the Mouse and His Internet Adventure by Constance Hanel, Ph.D., C.R.C., Linda Shields, M.S.Ed, and Barbara Trolley, M.S.Ed

 

Depression/Sadness/Negative Thinking

What to Do When You Grumble Too Much: A Kid’s Guide to Overcoming Negativity by Dawn Huebner

What To Do When Your Brain Gets Stuck: A Kid’s Guide to Overcoming OCD by Dawn Huebner

Jenny Is Scared! When Sad Things Happen in the World by Carol Shuman

What to Do When You’re Scared & Worried: A Guide for Kids by James J. Crist, Ph.D.

When Nothing Matters Anymore: A Survival Guide for Depressed Teens by Bev Cobain, R.N., C.

What Are You So Sad? A Child’s Book About Parental Depression by Beth Andrews

Sometimes I Get Sad (But Now I Know What Makes Me Happy) by Jane Ratcliffe

What To Do When You Worry Too Much: A Kid’s Guide to Overcoming Anxiety by Dawn Huebner, Ph.D.

Full Mouse, Empty Mouse: A Tale of Food and Feelings by Dina Zeckhausen, Ph.D.

The Power to Prevent Suicide (for teens, updated edition) by Richard E. Nelson, Ph.D., and Judith C. Galas

Why Would Someone Want to Die? By Rebecca C. Schmidt

Liking Myself (3rd Edition) by Pat Palmer, Ed.D.

I’m Not Happy by Sue Graves

Who Feels Scared by Sue Graves

Feeling Sad by Sarah Verroken

Does This Make Me Beautiful? By Harriet Morse

Don’t Blame Me! Prepare to Excel Beyond Your Wildest Dreams by Larry Cole

Growing Up with a Bucket Full of Happiness: Three Rules for a Happier Life by Carol McCloud

Have You Filled a Bucket Today? : A Guide to Daily Happiness for Kids by Carol McCloud

Tommy Starts Something Big: Giving Cuddles and Kindness by Chuck Gaidica

What Color is Your Heart? By Linda Reau

Why Are You So Scared? A Book Bout Parents with PTSD by Beth Andrews

Blueloon by Julia Cook

I Am Stumped! By Lisa Rivard

Has Llenado una Cubeta Hoy? Una Gui a Diaria de Felicidad para Niños by Carol McCloud

Cloud’s Best Worst Day Ever by Amy Novesky

Get Out of Your Mind & Into Your Life for Teens by Joseph V. Ciarrochi, Ph.D., Louise Hayes, Ph.D., and Ann Bailey, M.A.

When No One Understands by Brad Sachs, Ph.D.

Hannah Without A Home by Patti Hall, LCSE, and Sheila Devine, MIM

What Does Dead Mean? A Book for Young Children to Help Explain Death & Dying by Caroline Jay and Jenni Thomas

el PEOR dia de TODA mi vida/The Worst Day of My Life EVER by Julia Cook

The Grouchies (Chase Away a Grumpy Mood) by Debbie Wagenbach

Bubba Under Pressure: An Emotes Book About Happiness by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Bubba Bajo Presion: Un Libro Emotes Sobre La Alegria y La Presion by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Joi’s Cyber Coaster Adventure: An Emotes Book About Positive Thinking by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

What to Do When It’s Not Fair by Jacqueline B. Toner, Ph.D., and Claire A. B. Freeland, Ph.D.

A Happy Hat by Cecil Kim

What to Do When You’re Cranky and Blue by James J. Crist, Ph.D.

Shy Spaghetti and Excited Eggs: A Kid’s Menu of Feelings by Marc Nemiroff and Jane Annunziata

Ick and the Emotastone: An Emotes Book About Accepting Differences by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Celia the Great: Tricks for Being a Happy Kid by Abby Jacobs

Understanding Myself: A Kid’s Guide to Intense Emotions and Strong Feelings by Mary C. Lamia, Ph.D.

 

Disabilities

The Don’t Give Up Kid by Jeanne Gehret, M.A.

Los latidos de Yago by Conchita Miranda

What Do You Use to Help Your Body? By Jewel Kats

Cinderella’s Magical Wheelchair by Jewel Kats

Ditzabled Princess: A Comical Diary by Jewel Kats

 

Divorce

Ginny Morris and Mom’s House, Dad’s House by Mary Collins Gallagher, M.A., L.P.C.

My Parents Are Divorced Too: A Book for Kids by Kids (2nd Edition) by Melanie, Annie, and Steven Ford, as told to Jan Blackstone-Ford

What Can I Do? A Book for Children of Divorce by Danielle Lowry

Was It the Chocolate Pudding? A Story for Little Kids About Divorce by Sandra Levins

Families Change: A Book for Children Experiencing Termination of Parental Rights by Julie Nelson

Divorced Together for the Sake of the Children by Kristi Schwartz

Sending Love, My Different-Functional Family by Lori Hilliard

I Have Two Homes by Marian De Smet

My Life Turned Upside Down, But I Turned It Rightside Up by Mary Blitzer Field and Hennie Shore

 

Eating Disorders

Full Mouse, Empty Mouse: A Tale of Food and Feeling by Dina Zeckhausen, Ph.D.

My Big Fat Secret: How Jenna Takes Control of Her Emotions & Eating by Lynn R. Schechter

How To Be Comfortable in Your Own Feathers by Julia Cook

 

Enuresis/Encopresis

Clouds and Clocks: A Story for Children Who Soil by Matthew Galvin, M.D.

Sammy the Elephant and Mr. Camel: A Story to Help Children Overcome Bedwetting While Discovering Self-Appreciation (2nd Edition) by Joyce C. Mills, Ph.D., and Richard Crowley, Ph.D.

Sammy el Elefante y el Senor Camello (A story to help children overcome bedwetting by Joyce C. Mills, Ph.D., and Richard Crowley, Ph.D.

 

Feelings

Abash and the Cyber-Bully: An Emotes Book About Bullying by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Abash y el Peleon-Cibernetico: Un Libro Emotes Sobre la Intimidacion de Peleones Ciberneticos by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Así me siento yo by Janan Cain

Boom the Anger Tamer: An Emotes Book About Anger by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Bubba Bajo Presion: Un Libro Emotes Sobre La Alegria y La Presion by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Bubba Under Pressure: An Emotes Book About Happiness by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Cant Loses His Cool: An Emotes Book About Temper Tantrums by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Cant Pierde Su Calma: Un Libro Emotes Sobre Las Rabietas

Como apreciarme by Pat Palmer, Ed.D.

Don’t Feed the Worry Bug by Andi Green

Double-Dip Feelings: Stories to Help Children Understand Emotions, Second Edition by Barbara Cain

Drain and the Mystery of Sleep by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Drain y el Misterio del Sueno: Un Libro Emotes Sobre Tener Habitos Saludables by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Feeling Better: A Kid’s Book About Therapy by Rachel Rashkin

Feeling Sad by Sarah Verroken

Fill a Bucket: A Guide to Daily Happiness for young Children by Carol McCloud

The Monster Who Couldn’t Decide by Andi Green

Full Mouse, Empty Mouse: A Tale of Food and Feelings by Dina Zeckhausen, Ph.D>

Growing Up with a Bucket Full of Happiness: Three Rules for a Happier Life by Carol McCloud

Have You Filled A Bucket Today? : A Guide to Daily Happiness for Kids by Carol McCloud

How to Feel Good: 20 Things Teens Can Do by Tricia Mangan

I’m Excited by Elizabeth Crary, M.S.

I’m Frustrated by Elizabeth Crary, M.S.

I’m Furious by Elizabeth Crary, M.S.

I’m Mad by Elizabeth Crary, M.S.

I’m Not Happy by Sue Graves

I’m Proud by Elizabeth Crary

I’m Scared by Elizabeth Crary

Ick and The Emotastone: An Emotes Book About Accepting Differences by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Jenny Is Scared! When Sad Things Happen in the World by Carol Shuman

Joi’s Cyber-Coaster Adventure an Emotes Book about Positive Thinking by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Jumpi Goes to Camp: An Emotes Book About Being Afraid by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Jumpi Va a Campar: Un Libro Emotes Sobre Tener Miedo by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Liking Myself (3rd Edition) by Pat Palmer Ed.D.

Mixy’s Quest: An Emotes Book About Confusion by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

My Body Is Mine, My Feelings Are Mine by Susan Hoke, LCSW, ACSW

The Lonely Little Monster by Andi Green

Onionhead® Children’s A-Z Dictionary of 52 Emotions

Proud of Our Feelings by Lindsay Leghorn

The Nose That Didn’t Fit by Andi Green

The Monster in the Bubble by Andi Green

The Lion Who Lost His Roar by Marcia Shoshana Nass

The Monster Who Couldn’t Decide by Andi Green

The Penguin Who Lost Her Cool by Marla Sobel

The Very Frustrated Monster by Andi Green

The Way I Act by James Metzger

The Way I Feel by Janan Cain

Understand and Care by Cheri J. Meiners, Ed.D.

What Color is Your Heart? By Linda Reau

What to do When Your Temper Flares by Dawn Huebner, Ph.D.

When You’re HAPPY and You Know It by Elizabeth Crary, M.S., and Shari Steelsmith

When You’re MAD and You Know It by Elizabeth Crary, M.S., and Shari Steelsmith

When You’re SHY and You Know It by Elizabeth Crary, M.S., and Shari Steelsmith

When You’re SILLY and You Know It by Elizabeth Crary, M.S., and Shari Steelsmith

Who Feels Scared? by Sue Graves

Don’t Feed the WorryBug by Andi Graves

Yawni and the Perspecto-Goggles: An Emotes Book About Boredom by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Shy Spaghetti and Excited Eggs: A Kid’s Menu of Feelings by Marc Nemiroff and Jane Annunziata

My Big Fat Secrets: How Jenna Takes Control of Her Emotions & Eating by Lynn R. Schechter

Visiting Feelings by Lauren Rubenstein, J.D., Psy.D.

What to Do When It’s Not Fair by Jacqueline B. Toner, Ph.D., and Claire A.B. Freeland, Ph.D.

Some Days Are Lonely by Young-Ah Kim

A Happy Hat by Cecil Kim

Understanding Myself: A Kid’s Guide to Intense Emotions and Strong Feelings by Mary C. Lamia, Ph.D.

 

Friendship Skills

El Ratón, El Monstruo y Yo: Conducta asertiva para los jóvenes by Pat Palmer, Ed.D.

Circle of Three: Enough Friendship to Go Around by Elizabeth Brokamp

Toodles and Teeny: A Story About Friendship by Jill Neimark and Marcella Bakur Weiner

New Kid, New Scene: A Guide to Moving and Switching Schools by Debbie Glasser, Ph.D., and Emily Schenck

Loving Touches: A Book for Children About Positive, Caring Kinds of Touching by Lory Freeman

Teddy Bear Princess: A Story About Sharing and Caring by Jewel Kats

Sally Sore Loser: A Story About Winning & Losing by Frank J. Sileo

Big Ernie’s New Home: A Story for Children Who Are Moving by Teresa and Whitney Martin

A Good Friend: How to Make One, How to Be One by Ron Herron and Val J. Peter

Sometimes I Feel Like I Don’t Have Any Friends (But Not So Much Anymore) by Tracy Zimmerman and Lawrence Shapiro, Ph.D.

Tommy Starts Something Big: Giving Cuddles and Kindness by Chuck Gaidica and Kris Yankee

Cat’s Not So Perfect Sandcastle illustrations by Hanako Wakiyama

My Best Friend is Me! By Beth Ann Marcozzi

 

Grief and Bereavement

Samantha Jane’s Missing Smile: A Story about Coping with the Loss of a Parent by Julie Kaplow, Ph.D., and Donna Pincus, Ph.D

What On Earth Do You Do When Someone Dies? By Trevor Romain

Why Would Someone Want to Die? By Rebecca C. Schmidt

Good-bye Max by Diane Cantrell

Aractina Aprende a Decir Adios by M. Acuña M/ C. Bordagorry A. / N. Barceló G.

Cuerpo de nube by Ana A. de Eulate

Stella Our Star: Coping with a Loss During Pregnancy by Mandi Kowalik

Someone I Love Died by Suicide by Doreen Cammarata

Honey Bear Died by Jennifer E. Melvin

What Does Dead Mean? A Book for Young Children to Help Explain Death & Dying by Caroline Jay and Jenni Thomas

Ben’s Flying Flowers by Inger Maier

Healing Days: A Guide for Kids Who Have Experienced Trauma by Susan Farber Straus

Kate, The Ghost Dog: Coping With the Death of a Pet by Wayne L. Wilson

Goodbye, Brecken by David Lupton

 

Medical

Be the Boss of Your Pain: Self-Care for Kids by Timothy Culbert, M.D., and Rebecca Kajander C.P.N.P, M.P.H.

Be the Boss of Your Stress: Self-Care for Kids by Timothy Culbert, M.D., and Rebecca Kajander C.P.N.P, M.P.H.

You Can Call Me Willy: A Story for Children About AIDS by Joan C. Verniero

Ditzabled Princess: A Comical Diary by Jewel Kats

 

Pre-Adolescence

What to do When Your Temper Flares by Dawn Huebner, Ed.D.

What to do When Your Brain Gets Stuck: A Kid’s Guide to Overcoming OCD by Dawn Huebner, Ed.D.

Be the Boss of Your Pain: Self-Care for Kids by Timothy Culbert, M.D., and Rebecca Kajander C.P.N.P, M.P.H.

How Not To Be a Bully Target by Terry Centrone

Stress Can Really Get on Your Nerves by Trevor Romain and Elizabeth Verdick

How to Do Homework Without Throwing Up by Trevor Romain

True or False? Tests Stink! By Trevor Romain and Elizabeth Verdick

The Kid’s Guide to Working Out Conflicts: How to Keep Cool, Stay Safe, and Get Along by Naomi Drew, M.A.

Feeling Better: A Kid’s Book About Therapy by Rachel Rashkin, M.S.

See My Pain! 3rd Edition by Susan Bowman, Ed.S., L.P.C., and Kaye Randall, LMSW

Girl Grudges: Learning How to Forgive and Live by Cheryl Dellasega, Ph.D., and Shileste Overton Morris, B.A.

Full Mouse, Empty Mouse: A Tale of Food and Feelings by Dina Zeckhausen, Ph.D.

The Power to Prevent Suicide (for teens, updated edition) by Richard E. Nelson, Ph.D., and Judith C. Galas

Why Would Someone Want to Die? By Rebecca C. Schmidt

What to Do When Good Enough Isn’t Good Enough: The Real Deal on Perfectionism by Thomas S. Greenspon, Ph.D.

The Mouse, The Monster, and Me – Assertiveness for Young People by Pat Palmer, Ed.D.

 

Self Injury

A Short Introduction to Understanding and Supporting Children and Young People Who Self-Harm by Carol Fitzpatrick

Stopping the Pain: A Workbook for Teens Who Cut and Self-Injure By Lawrence E Shapiro

See My Pain! 3rd Edition (Youth who self-injure) by Susan Bowman, Ed.S., L.P.C., and Kaye Randall, LMSW

 

Self-Esteem

Always Late Nate (a book about making positive choices) by Nathan Krivitzky

Como apreciarme by Pat Palmer, Ed.D.

Does This Make Me Beautiful? By Harriet Morse

Don’t Blame Me! Prepare to Excel Beyond Your Wildest Dreams by Larry Cole

Frog’s Breathtaking Speech by Michael Chissick

I Like Myself! By Karen Beaumont

It’s Hard to be A Verb! By Julia Cook

Sometimes I Don’t Like to Talk (But Sometimes I Can’t Keep Quiet) by Jessica Lamb-Shapiro

Sometimes I Drive My Mom Crazy (But I Know She’s Crazy About Me) by Lawrence E. Shapiro

Sometimes I Feel Like I Don’t Have Any Friends (But Not So Much Anymore) by Tracy Zimmerman and Lawrence Shapiro, Ph.D.

Sometimes I Get Sad (But Now I Know What Makes Me Happy) by Jane Ratcliffe

Sometimes I Like to Fight (But I Don’t Do It Much Anymore) by Lawrence E. Shapiro, Ph.D.

Sometimes I Worry Too Much (But Now I Know How to Stop) by Dawn A. Huebner, Ph.D.

Stick Up For Yourself! Every Kid’s Guide to Personal Pwer and Positive Self-Esteem (revised and updated) by Gershen Kaufman, Ph.D., Lev Raphael, Ph.D., and Pamela Espeland

The Dragon Who Pulled Her Scales by William Michael Davidson

The Hero in Me by Susan Fitzsimonds

Tommy Starts Something Big: Giving Cuddles and Kindness by Chuck Gaidica and Kris Yankee

Lola Goes to Work: A Nine-to-Five Therapy Dog by Marcia Goldman

My Big Fat Secret: How Jenna Takes Control of Her Emotions & Eating by

Don’t Call Me a Tattletale! By Kimberly Koskos

Celia the Great: Tricks for Being a Happy Kid by Abby Jacobs

How To Be Comfortable in Your Own Feathers by Julia Cook

Feel Confident! By Cheri J. Meiners

 

Separation

Mommy Don’t Go by Elizabeth Crary, M.S.

I’m Lost by Elizabeth Craary, M.S.

 

Social and Emotional Competence Skills

A Boy and a Bear: The Children’s Relaxation Book by Lori Lite

Accept and Value Each Person by Cheri J. Meiners

Be the Boss of Your Stress: Self-Care for Kids by Timothy Culbert, M.D., and Rebecca Kajander C.P.N.P, M.P.H.

Becoming Someone’s Hero: A Book for the Bystanders of Bullying by Sandy Ragona, M.S.Ed.

Caillou: Day Care by Christine L’Heureux and Gisèle Lègarè

Caillou: Hurry Up! By Joceline Sanschagrin

Caillou: Play With Me! By Christine L’Heureux

Can I Tell You About Selective Mutism? A Guide for Friends, Family, and Professionals by Maggie Johnson and Alsion Wintgens

Cliques Just Don’t Make Cents by Julia Cook

Cucho le dice NO al estrés by N. Barceló G./ C. Bordagorry A.

Does This Make Me Beautiful? By Harriet Morse

Don’t Blame Me! Prepare to Excel Beyond Your Wildest Dreams by Larry Cole

Don’t Squeal Unless It’s A Big Deal: A Tale of Tattletales by Jenanie Franz Ransom, MA

el PEOR dia de TODA mi vida/The Worst Day of My Life EVER by Julia Cook

Fill a Bucket: A Guide to Daily Happiness for Young Children by Carol McCloud

Frog’s Breathtaking Speech by Michael Chissick

Good For You, Grisha: Teaching Kids Ways to Cope by Karen Westhoven

Growing Up with a Bucket Full of Happiness: Three Rules for a Happier Life by Carol McCloud

Has Llenado una Cubeta Hoy? Una Gui a Diaria de Felicidad para Niños by Carol McCloud

Have You Filled a Bucket Today? : A Guide to Daily Happiness for Kids by Carol McCloud

How to Talk to an Autistic Kid by Daniel Stefanski

I Am Stumped by Lisa Rivard

I Can’t Wait by Elizabeth Crary, M.S.

I Just Want to Do It My Way! My Story About Staying on Task by Julia Cook

I Want It by Elizabeth Crary, M.S.

I Want to Play by Elizabeth Crary, M.S.

I’m Lost by Elizabeth Crary, M.S.

Ick and the Emotastone: An Emotes Book About Accepting Differences by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

If You’re Bothered… and you know it by Tricia Murin

It’s Hard to Be A Verb! By Julia Cook

Kicky the Mean Chick Learns Her Lesson & Other Kicky Tales by Erika Karres

Liking Myself (3rd Edition) by Pat Palmer, Ed.D.

Listen and Learn by Cheri J. Meiners, M.Ed.

Mad: How to Deal With Anger and Get Respect by James J. Crist, Ph.D.

Mommy Don’t Go by Elizabeth Crary, M.S.

My Mouth is a Volcano by Julia Cook

My Name is Not Dummy by Elizabeth Crary, M.S.

Nobody Likes Me, Everybody Hates Me: The Top 25 Friendship Problems and How to Solve Them by Michele Borba, Ed.D.

Nuevas téchnicas de relajación para niños y adolescents by Silvina Hopkins

Out of This World: Max Strives for Success! Victory Through Motivation by John Filitti

Out of This World: Face to Face with X-35 by John Filitti

Out of This World: Tiglos vs Secca Ma by John Filitti

Pressure-True Stories by Teens About Stress edited by Al Desetta

Ricky Sticky Fingers by Julia Cook

Sometimes I Don’t Like to Talk (But Sometimes I Can’t Keep Quiet) by Jessica Lamb-Shapiro

Sometimes I Feel Like I Don’t Have Any Friends (But Not So Much Anymore) by Tracy Zimmerman and Lawrence Shapiro, Ph.D.

Sometimes I Get Sad (But Now I Know What Makes Me Happy) by Jane Ratcliffe

Sometimes I Like to Fight (But I Don’t Do It Much Anymore) by Lawrence E. Shapiro, Ph.D.

Stick Up For Yourself~ Every Kid’s Guide to Personal Power and Positive Self-Esteem (revised and updated) by Gershen Kaufman, Ph.D., Lev Raphael, Ph.D., and Pamela Espeland

Teamwork Isn’t My Thing, and I Don’t Like to Share! By Julia Cook

Tease Monster: A Book about Teasing vs. Bullying by Julia Cook

Teddy Bear Princess: A Story About Sharing and Caring by Jewel Kats

The Courage to Be Yourself: True Stories by Teens About Cliques, Conflicts, and Overcoming Peer Pressure edited by Al Desetta, M.A., and Educators for Social Responsibility

The Hero in Me by Susan Fitzsimonds

The Mouse, the Monster, and Me – Assertiveness for Young People (Curb Bullying) by Pat Palmer, Ed.D.

The Princess and the Ruby: An Autism Fairy Tale by Jewel Kats

The Rabbit Who Lost His Hop by Marica Shoshana Nass

The Way I Act by James Metzger

Tommy Starts Something Big: Giving Cuddles and Kindness by Chuck Gaidica and Kris Yankee

Try and Stick with It by Cheri J. Meiners, M.Ed.

Understand and Care by Cheri J. Meiners, M.Ed.

Understanding Sam and Asperger Syndrome by Clarabelle van Niekerk and Liezl Venter

What Color is Your Heart? By Linda Reau

What Do You Use to Help Your Body? By Jewel Kats

What to Do When Good Enough Isn’t Good Enough: The Real Deal on Perfectionism by Thomas S. Greenspon, Ph.D.

What to do When Your Temper Flares by Dawn Huebner, Ph.D.

When You’re HAPPY and You Know It by Elizabeth Crary, M.S., and Shari Steelsmith

When You’re MAD and You Know It by Elizabeth Crary, M.S., and Shari Steelsmith

When You’re SHY and You Know It by Elizabeth Crary, M.S., and Shari Steelsmith

When You’re SILLY and You Know It by Elizabeth Crary, M.S., and Shari Steelsmith

Who is in Your Family? A Celebration in Diversity by Susan Bowman

Words Are Not for Hurting/Las palabras no son para lastimar by Elizabeth Verdick

Yawni and the Perspecto-Goggles: An Emotes Book About Boredom by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Zach Apologizes by William Mulcahy

Zach Get Frustrated by William Mulcahy

No, No, No! by Marie-Isabelle Callier

Ick and the Emotastone: An Emotes Book About Accepting Differences by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

El Ratón, El Monstruo y Yo: Conducta asertiva para los jóvenes by Pat Palmer, Ed.D

The Grouchies (Chase Away a Grumpy Mood) by Debbie Wagenbach

Abash and the Cyber-Bully: An Emotes Book About Bulying by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Super and Perfecto: An Emotes Book About Confidence by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Cant Loses His Cool: An Emotes Book About Temper Tantrums by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Mixy’s Quest: An Emotes Book about Confusion by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

A Happy Hat by Cecil Kim

What to Do When You’re Cranky and Blue by James J. Crist, Ph.D.

How to Be Human: Diary of an Autistic Girl by Florida Franz

Visiting Feelings by Lauren Rubenstein, J.D., Psy.D.

What to Do When It’s Not Fair by Jacqueline B. Toner, Ph.D., and Claire A.B. Freeland, Ph.D.

The Survival Guide for Kids with Behavior Challenges by Tom McIntyre, Ph.D.

Lola Goes to Work: A Nine-to-Five Therapy Dog by Maria Goldman

Boom the Anger Tamer: An Emotes Book About Anger by Matt Casper and Ted Dorsey

Joi’s Cyber-Coaster Adventure: An Emotes Book About Positive Thinking

Healing Days: A Guide for Kids Who Have Experienced Trauma by Susan Farber Straus

Eli’s Lie-O-Meter by Sandra Levins

Goodbye, Brecken by David Lupton

Some Days Are Lonely by Young-Ah Kim

I Can’t Do Anything by Thierry Robberecht

New Kid, New Scene: A Guide to Moving and Switching Schools by Debbie Glassner, Ph.D., and Emily Schneck

Understanding Myself: A Kid’s Guide to Intense Emotions and Strong Feelings by Mary C. Lamia, Ph.D.

 

Trauma

Something Happened and I’m Scared to Tell: A Book for Young Victims of Abuse by Patricia Kehoe, Ph.D.

Algo Paso y Me Da Miedo Decirlo (Something Happened and I’m Scared to Tell) by Patricia Kehoe, Ph.D.

A Terrible Thing Happened: A story for children who have witnessed violence or trauma by Margaret M. Holmes

Jenny Is Scared! When Sad Things Happen in the World by Carol Shuman

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Categories : ADHD, Anger, Anxiety, Behavior, Bibliotherapy, Books, Bullying, Child Development, Communication, Conflict, Divorce, Feelings, Play Therapy books, Self-Esteem, Sexual Abuse, Social and Emotional Competence, Trauma and Grief

Nails in the Fence by Brandon R. Menikheim

Posted by Gary Yorke 
· August 16, 2016 
· 2 Comments

angry girl

Theme: Identifying Feelings, Anger, Anger Management, Cool down strategies

Recommended Ages: 5th Grade +

Goals:  Identify anger as an emotion, Describe inappropriate responses to anger, and learn appropriate responses

Materials: Wooden slate, Hammer, Nails

 

Description:

This activity involves story-telling, discussion, and physical activity. The goal as noted above, is to assist children in developing the ability to identify anger and learn appropriate responses when angry. The combination of story-telling, discussion, and physical activity keeps children engaged.

 

Directions:


hammerandnailBegin by asking, “Is anger good or bad?” The typical response from most students is “bad”. This question always leads into a great discussion about anger and angry behavior. During this phase of the discussion the group leader draws attention to anger as an emotion that is neither good nor bad, but simply a feeling.  The leader should emphasize that the problematic aspect of anger is not the feelings associated with it, but instead the reaction to those feelings. It is the way anger is handled that can be deemed as “good or bad,” “helpful or not helpful,” or “appropriate or not appropriate.”

 

Introduce the story by reading the title and read the first paragraph (Full Story Below):

 

“There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him  that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.”

 

hammerandnailAsk the students why  the father wanted his son to hammer the nails into a fence.  As part of the discussion include the idea that losing our temper is a common response to anger, but there are a number of other reactions that may follow anger as well. Encourage participants to identify some of these responses, as well as identifying the circumstances that lead to anger. Encourage participation by letting the participants know that they will be granted the opportunity to hammer a nail into a piece of wood, similar to what the father suggested his son do in the story. Individually, students may be called on to answer one or more of the questions posed, and after expressing their opinions on the topic, they are guided in hammering the nail into the wood.  Upon completion of the hammering activity, continue with reading more of the story:

 

“The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence. Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.”

 

hammerandnailPropose to the students that learning to control anger really takes practice. Ask the students what are some good or appropriate responses to anger that can elicit a calming effect. Explain to the students that those who engage in the conversation will have the opportunity to come up to the slab of wood, and pull out one of the nails that were hammered into it. Once all the nails have been removed from the wood, guide the students in a discussion about what they think the purpose of this activity is? Draw special attention to the outcome associated with pulling the nails out of the wood before reading the conclusion of the story:

 

“The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, “You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one.”

 

Discussion:

Part of anger management  is trial and error, looking for what works in helping to calm down. There is no universal technique, as individual differences require something slightly different for each person. Anger management is not a prescribed direction, but rather suggestions or guidelines that allow for individuals to adapt the various techniques in a manner that is personally beneficial. Successful management of anger requires us to learn that there are alternative responses available to us, and training ourselves to not automatically revert to the negative reactions. Students should be encouraged to discuss their personal cognitive schemas associated with anger management. What sets them off, and in response, what do they feel is the warranted response to address that anger? Specifically focus on appropriate versus inappropriate anger responses, centering discussions on negative consequences that may be the result of certain responses, or the cause of certain responses. Follow-up discussion should center on the lasting effects of inappropriate responses to anger. Students sometimes believe that if they do not physically touch someone, their response is still appropriate, or if they apologize for their actions after the fact, it makes everything alright. Frequently there is a permanency to actions. People are sensitive to words just as much as they are to physical aggression. Forgiveness is something many people will eventually and/or willingly grant others, but forgetting the way that person made them feel is something many people have challenges letting go of. Words and actions can never be taken back, and the scars they leave behind are long lasting, regardless of how much the perpetrator changes. Learning more appropriate responses is the key, as it is the decrease and elimination of inappropriate responses that will contribute to positive relationships.

Thanks Brandon for another great submission! Check out our Anger Management Education Package and other anger management resources here!

 

nails in the fence title

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.

The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.

The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, “You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one.

2 Comments
Categories : Anger, Behavior, Parenting, Reader Submissions, Storytelling

The Importance of Play: What can a child therapist do?

Posted by Gary Yorke 
· July 26, 2016 
· No Comments
play games

                                  (Basic Play Therapy Game Package by Dr. Gary)

 

Child clinicians have always been aware of the importance of play. And by play I don’t mean playing a video game or staring at a screen! Some studies are now indicating that the average nine-year-old spends 35 hours in front of a TV, and another 10 hours per week in front of other screens. Researchers are beginning to talk about a “Play Deficit Disorder.” Peter Gray in his 2014 TED talk offers a succinct and convincing argument that play is declining and what the consequences are of this decline in play.

So what is play? According to the United Kingdom’s Children’s Play Information Service:

Play includes a range of self-chosen activities, undertaken for their own interest, enjoyment and the satisfaction that results for children;

Very young children, even babies, show playful behavior when they explore sound and simple actions and experiment with objects of interest;

Play activities are not essential to meet basic physical survival needs. But play does seem to support children’s emotional well-being as well as a wide range of learning within their whole development;

Children can play alone, but often they play with other children and with familiar adults. Even very young children engage in simple give-and-take or copying games with their peers, older siblings or with adults;

A playful quality in activities is shown by the exercise of choice, enjoyable repetition and invitation to others to join the play.

 In the 1930s Vygotsky noted the centrality and importance of play in normal development. In a fascinating TED talk “Play Is More Than Just Fun” Stuart Brown noted that not only does play make us happy, but it also makes us smarter. His studies of criminals revealed that many of the folks that go on to commit horrible crimes against their fellow humans have been deprived of developmentally appropriate play.

play room1

               ( Rolling Filial Play Therapy Kit)

On a behavioral and social level play allow children to experiment with social behaviors and interactions. Links between children’s propensity to play and their development of cooperative skills, social competence, and peer acceptance have been empirically established. Play allows children to experiment with social interactions and behaviors. Piaget theorized that make-believe play provides children opportunities to reproduce real-life conflicts, to work out ideal resolutions for their own pleasure, and to ameliorate negative feelings.  Developmental psychologists suggest play constitutes an emotionally significant context through which themes of power and dominance, aggression, nurturance, anxiety, pain, loss, growth, and joy can be enacted productively.

Not only is play important for development of social and emotional intelligence, it is also necessary for the development of the brain. All mammals play, and animal research has clearly demonstrated the deleterious effects of no play. In his TED talk Stuart Brown reported that when play is suppressed in rats their survival behaviors become altered, and when exposed to a threat they hide as they should, but they never venture out from their hiding spot and subsequently die. In humans, play changes the connections of neurons in the prefrontal cortex, and it is these neurons that play an important role in executive functioning.

 

 

So what is a child therapist to do? Winnicott argued that playing is a necessary part of working with children: “Psychotherapy takes place in the overlap of two areas of playing, that of the patient and that of the therapist. Psychotherapy has to do with two people playing together. The corollary of this is that where playing is not possible then the work done by the therapist is directed towards bringing the patient from a state of not being able to play into a state of being able to play.”

It seems that we now find ourselves in a position of teaching many of our clients how to play! Other opportunities to promote play may arise when counseling parents or consulting in schools. There is probably not a single child clinician who hasn’t cringed when told that a child is routinely punished by withholding recess. If anything, we should be giving our clients more play time when they are challenged to regulate themselves in a classroom. IEPs and 504 plans should note that recess should not be used as a negative consequence. Many of our clients are over scheduled, and parents may need help prioritizing what activities the child is enrolled in. And of course, screen time needs to be regulated.

 

playtherapyroom2

                  Complete Play Therapy Room

Visit Child Therapy Toys for more play therapy supplies and kits!

 

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Categories : ADHD, Anger, Anxiety, Art Therapy, Behavior, Child Development, Communication, Play Therapy, Play Therapy books, Play Therapy Games, Play Therapy news, Play Therapy Toys

‘Pop That Feeling’ Intervention Idea

Posted by Gary Yorke 
· September 4, 2015 
· No Comments

Here’s another fun intervention idea from reader Jessalyn Pedone that utilizes bubbles and balloons to encourage the expression of negative feelings. Ms. Pedone earned a gift certificate to childtherapytoys.com for her submission. Learn how you can do the same!

Theme: Expressing feeling, feeling identification and exploration, and body cues
Recommended Ages: Pre-K through 3rd grade
Goals: Client will be able to identify triggers for various feelings as well as practice deep breathing techniques
Materials: Bubbles, balloons, paper plates or construction paper

Description:
First I have the child think of as many feelings as they can. I then ask to them write the words and/or draw the faces associated with the feelings, depending on their age. Next, I tape the words or drawings to the wall or table and we briefly talk about how we express the feelings with our faces and bodies. At times I will implement some mirroring activity so they can see what face they are making for the feeling. I then have clients try to hit the words, drawings, or mirrored reflections with their choice of balloon or bubbles. When the balloon or bubbles hit the faces or words I have them say “I feel _____ when _____.” After the activity we talk about ways to calm down when we are having negative feelings. We then do deep breathing techniques using bubbles or balloons or both, and talk about how doing this when we are experiencing negative emotions can help us!

Discussion:
Many of the children I work with have trouble understanding feelings and how these feelings affect our overall mood and behavior. These children also struggle with identifying triggers for these emotions. Some children I work with have also learned that it is not acceptable to discuss feelings and that positive feelings are the only acceptable feelings to have. This activity facilitates an easy transition to discussing ways to cope with these feelings including deep breathing techniques. This activity is a fun way for kids to discuss various feelings, visualize what body and facial cues are present when these feelings are present, and to learn that they can talk about various positive and negative feelings in a safe and comfortable environment.

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Categories : Anger, Communication, Feelings, Intervention Ideas, Reader Submissions
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